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The Light Files - Sandra Filer

Sandra Filer

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Today’s guest chose to leave her cush job as a banker to pursue a happier life. Laura Max chats with certified life coach Sandra Filer, The Happy Goddess.

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Laura: Hi, everyone. I'm Laura Max, your host of The Light Files on The I'm so excited to be here today with Sandra Filer. Sandra is known online as The Happy Goddess or Diosa Feliz. She continually inspires people with her online presence and her many other talents including being a Reiki master and a oracle card reader. But prior to that, at the age of 39 years old, Sandra left there banking industry to follow her now very unconventional dreams and unconventional ways, which is just what we love learning about here on The Light Files. So, welcome to the show, Sandra.

Sandra: Thank you, Laura. I'm really excited to be here.

Laura: I'm so happy to have you here. And just so our audience knows - I've been following Sandra online really for a year and I have never actually met her. And she's really probably changed my life with some of the things you post online, really encouraging people to just be themselves and just be authentic. So, thank you.

Sandra: Yes, thank you.

Laura: That's my first thing. And you did leave a very different job when you were 39 years old. You were a banker.

Sandra: That's correct.

Laura: And you really jumped off the ledge into your current career. Can you tell us about what made you feel like you could do something like that?

Sandra: Well, it took a lot of courage.

Laura: I can imagine.

Sandra: It took a lot of courage. The banking industry defined me. I had started at a very young age and it was really a moment of - I knew that I could no longer do it because of the way I watched people be treated and that wasn't what resonated with me. I'm all about kindness and fairness and I wasn't seeing that in that industry.

Laura: So, you described to me yesterday - we were talking - you described this real transformation that you had that was actually started by a book. Can you tell us a little bit about that?

Sandra: Yes, actually. I was going through a struggle in the year 2000. It was a very pivotal year for me. And I was in Florida at one of the places that I absolutely love and I feel a lot of magic happens. In a small library run by little volunteer elderly women, I found Louise Hay's book You Can Heal Your Life and I know at that point, I know I needed a lot of adjustment in my life. So, I just began to read the book cover to cover and doing the exercises and it made an enormous impact in my life and the way I saw things.

Laura: So, for those who don't know, Louise Hay is the owner of Hay House Publications and they publish tons of books that inspire people to really live their best life. So, you are now a Heal Your Life licensed -

Sandra: Workshop leader and a licensed coach.

Laura: A licensed workshop leader.

Sandra: Yeah. So, I get to carry her torch and continue to help inspire others to live a life filled with healthy choices and grounded and rooted in love.

Laura: Now, what are some of the most rewarding things that you've gotten out of choosing to make this transition?

Sandra: Truly, I'd have to say right out of the gate that something actually Mary Kay Ash taught me is to work your business around your life. And I'm not having to wake in the dark and drive in the dark and come home in the dark. My travel is either to the beach to do my job or it's down the hall in my slippers.

Laura: It's really amazing. I mean, that's what everyone - I graduated college and thought, "How am I gonna make this happen?" I haven't made it happen yet but it's really amazing that you've been able to carve out that kind of a life for yourself and I'm sure very inspiring to a lot of people who do sit at a desk every day and aren't necessarily happy with that.

Sandra: Yeah. It can be a tough existence going into work, going out of work, going into work, going out of work and I basically believe that our whole purpose is to experience joy and to be doing what is joyful. And briefly, when we talked, we were talking about the "should" word. And I know especially for women, what rules us are those "shoulds".

Laura: Yeah, don't "should" all over yourself.

Sandra: Don't "should" all over yourself.

Laura: That's one of my favorite things to say.

Sandra: Yeah, that's right, you know? And so we do that a lot. And so we get in a job that gives us, you know, great benefits and a retirement plan and some of us never leave because of that. And it's a false sense of security. So, when you can make that decision and be brave and courageous, as many women are - and men - it makes enormous change in all areas of your life.

Laura: So, it makes sense that people would kind of be sitting, shaking, listening to this thinking, "Oh, heck no. There's no way I could ever do something like that." What kind of guidance would you give to yourself as maybe a 20 something or to other 20 somethings who are listening to this right now and saying, "I want to be more like that woman but have no idea how"?

Sandra: You know - and this goes back to a comment you made to me yesterday and said, "You know, I hope when I'm your age, I can wear my hair like you." And I would encourage you to wear your hair earlier than I did like me because why wait until you're 50, right?

Laura: Get ready, The Light Files. I'm gonna come back with short, hot pink hair.

Sandra: Yes. So, right there - there's one of the 20 somethings thing I would say is don't wait until you're 50. Do the things you want to do now because why wait for 25 years to do something like that? Which is also very relative to something else about career, especially, that often times, as young people - and I know from myself, I did things because I felt I should.

Laura: Don't "should" all of yourself.

Sandra: Yeah, exactly. Wearing the "should" boots and going around, you know, with all this guilt because my mother thought I should or my dad thought I should or -

Laura: Especially parents. As much as they love us and as much as we love them, they're gonna have expectations for us that don't align with our expectations for ourselves.

Sandra: Often times, we go to a school we may not even want to go to because somebody in our family went to that school. So, the purpose of life, again, is joy. That's what I truly feel and that when we are in that spirit of joy, we naturally attract more into our lives. So, taking a look at is what you're going fulfilling? Do you wake up in the morning and say, "Oh, yeah. I'm like, so ready"? Or do you wake up in the morning and go, "Ugh. Is it Monday?"

Laura: I mean, I can hear a lot of 20 somethings - and myself even - listening to this thinking, "You know, I want all that, but am I going to be able to afford it, you know?" People have these big jobs because what if they don't have those big jobs? What do you have to say to that?

Sandra: That's another great question because when I left corporate America, I was making a really great salary and I had, you know, a brand new car, I had a really nice condo - you know, I basically had all my needs met financially and of course, my finances went right down. However, I didn't really need all those things that I thought were making me happy. What we're looking for in life is experiences that, again, bring us joy, bring us happiness, bring us fulfillment. We're looking for the experience and really, that new car or that new place - it's about the experience, it's about the feeling in it. And so point A to point B, if I drive a little beater or I drive a brand new car, it's the same thing.

Laura: Yeah, as long as you're getting what you really need from your life, you think less about those material goods. It gets much easier to live without them.

Sandra: Yes.

Laura: I remember doing freelance photography after college. I was making hardly any money at all and I had just enough to get by. And it was probably one of my happiest times, actually, that I can remember. I was so grateful for all the little things that happened in the every day. Somebody would call me and want to take me out to lunch and I would really notice how special that was that I was getting taken care of. It's harder to hear and see those things when, you know, you're moving so quickly.

Sandra: Yes.

Laura: So, even if we can just slow down a little bit in our day to day lives, I think that makes all the difference, too.

Sandra: It makes a big difference. And also, keep on keeping on, you know? It does - with - in anything in life, nothing happens immediately.

Laura: It's a progression. It's not gonna happen overnight.

Sandra: That's right.

Laura: You don't have to quit your job today. You can do little things.

Sandra: Well, here's another great tip. That if there's something that you really want to do and you're not quite ready to take the complete leap, begin to build it. And one great way of building it is by getting up every day and starting work at 5:00 AM. We call it the 5:00 club. Work from 5:00 until 7:30 or eight. Do it five days a week. There's 15 hours you had to invest in your dream. And so therefore, you can have your foot over here, you know, in safety and then you can have your one foot over here right at the edge for when you're ready to actually put on those wings and fly.

Laura: And then maybe one day, you know, those 15 hours will turn into your full time, like it has for you.

Sandra: That's right. That's how it works.

Laura: I have to say, I'm just even happier having spoken to you for the seven or eight minutes that we've gotten to talk. It's been just such an honor to have you on the show.

Sandra: Well, I'm excited to see you fulfilling your dream and also really - in watching some of the other interviews that were done, taking every day, ordinary people and showing their human side - it's a real gift, Laura, so thank you.

Laura: Thank you, Sandra. So, Sandra, I've been so inspired by following you online on Facebook and your website. If any of our audience members want to follow you, where can they do that?

Sandra: Well, thank you, Laura. You can get ahold of me on my website. It's or Facebook - Sandra J. Filer - or my fan page is The Happy Goddess, Diosa Feliz.

Laura: Well, thank you so much for coming on the show today, Sandra. I'm sure you've brought lots of love and light to everyone watching, especially me, over the last year. As always, I am Laura Max, your host of The Light Files on brought to you by Audi Central Houston and we'll see you again next week. Bye, everyone.

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